frez's BLOG

6/12/25 (12:15am)
This is the first day Ive made this site, I dont rlly know what a blog is but my mom had one,,, lol
Im just gonna spew my thoughts and use this as a public journal

I think that challenging thoughts is the only way to advance your worldview. If you don't challenge what you are thinking, how do you know its right?
For the longest time I have rejected the idea of god and have had a very aithest view, but recently I've realized that aitheism is impossible lol. It seems that way to me at least.
I watched this video and it gave me some real insight on what religion is. Not just a story, but a reason.
religion seemed like a lie which people told to themselves in order to give themselves a reason. I think this is true for most cases(being told to follow a religion as a child is a different thing)
I think that true religion is discovery of what one beleives is the universe's truth and how the world is able to work the way it does.

I might expand on this a little later but its like 1am right now LOL
6/13/25 (4:18pm)
Im done packing for my summer trip, kinda nervous as always but I think the key is to stay occupied
I have some goals and plans for me to be productive and manage my time well, idk if its going to work out well tho
Last time I tried to catch up with some algebra last summer I ended up doing less than 25% of the amount I expected to do.
I really hope this time is different though, I feel more excited to improve my skills, who knows what I will learn.
Im going to be giving little updates on my progress as time goes on.
Slow is smooth, smooth is fast.
6/24/25(3:41pm)
I haven't been as intectually productive as I planned. While not studying any math or physics I have gotten quite a distance through house of leaves
it's a very interesting book, navigating topics of phycology and showing the process of phycosis.
Although it is quite dark, i'm enjoying it quite a lot.
There was a point earlier this year that my attempts of discovering my meaning and the purpose I have would put me into a type of phycosis.
Being wrong about something I belive in so much is scary to me not because of the idea of being wrong but I think it would break my perception of reality, forcing me to start over on that journy.
Aside from that, i've been working out again. My goal is to run an 8 minute mile which I think is very achiveable.
I'm going to try and do something to challenge my mind later today, maybe right after I finish writing this.
idk though. I don't feel the same when I am at my dad's house.